


Infuriating

by CursedGay



Series: Midnight City Writing [3]
Category: Homestuck, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
Genre: Gen, timeline 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 16:26:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15004790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CursedGay/pseuds/CursedGay
Summary: Pickle Inspector rivals Diamonds Droog and reflects on how he can do better.





	Infuriating

The moment they first met gazes in Problem Sleuth's office, that was when it started going downhill.

Diamonds Droog was imposing, he was intimidating, just with how he carried and composed himself. It made Pickle Inspector uncomfortable just standing near him. He felt horribly inadequate, that the only man that matched his own smarts was so.... so much _better_ than him. The only person that could hope to keep up with his brain was like a modern Adonis. It was horribly agitating.  
The only thing he had against Droog was kindness and his imagination.

The Inspector became obsessed not long after that, and every time he encountered the mobster he strived to be impressive. He tried to go beyond his capabilities in fights, and every time a problem was thrown his way he strained himself solving it as soon as he could. He had no idea if Droog noticed or not.   
He wasn't a competitive person in the slightest, or so he liked to think. He just _needed_ to be on the same level as the suave motherfucker breaking his nose with a cue stick every other week. By now he was a pro at resetting the cartilage by himself.

Pickle Inspector was finally getting a leg up, he had Droog cornered in the vault. The cops were on their way. His hand had never been so steady holding his pistol. Then Droog rushed at him, and he faltered- he panicked. There was a hand gripping his wrist hard, and he couldn't properly hold his gun. Another hand grabbed the hair behind his head, fingers carding through the ponytail before yanking down and making him look at the ceiling. 

"We'll need to work on your reaction time, Inspector. You could have died just then." Droog was speaking to him directly, for the first time since they'd met. PI shivered and tried to look down, but just like that Droog was gone. The hand on his hair gone so abruptly that he almost fell forward when his head went back down. He dropped the gun, then hurried to pick it back up.

Droog had just vanished, and the Inspector was even more infuriated and infatuated then ever. 

Talking about it didn't help.

"He kn-knows he's better, and he's _smug_ about it."   
He was sorting folders while Sleuth leaned on his desk and ate his lunch. He'd started to complain when Sleuth egged him on to open up more.

"How's he better'n you?" The blonde detective wasn't looking at him, he was busy scraping the bottom of a pudding cup with a plastic spoon. When he got that last spoonful, he finally glanced back at his partner and best friend.

"He's.... he's smoother. Better looking. Stronger and more composed. He's a-actually intimidating..." Pickle's face started to redden and he cleared his throat, ducking down to root through his desk drawers.  
This was embarrassing now, shit. 

"Yeah so? He can afford t' look nice an' his body retains muscle mass, big deal. He ain't as smart as you are, and he definitely ain't as creative. Ya can't beat 'im at his game y'know, but you can do one better." Sleuth grinned and leaned over the desk, pulling at Pickle's sweater until the taller man sat back up.

"Do _your_ thing to best him." He dusted off the invisible dirt from PI's shoulder and patted his cheek cheerfully.

"I-I never get the chance to do MY thing! I might d-die first!" PI frowned and pushed Sleuth away before standing up, picking up a few folders.  
"I'm gonna run these down the labs..." He mumbled, then left his office to go downstairs.


End file.
